There are few places in the world where you can overhear, "It's a vagina. With pudding in it," and not be surprised. Artomatic is one of them. The Washington Post declared this year's iteration "A Little Bit of Everything." We say balderdash! With 10 floors of an empty office space in Crystal City packed to the gills, er, air ducts, Artomatic 2012 is A LOT of everything, pudding va-jays and all. In fact, Artomatic is so big this year that we only made it through the four upper floors before we hit the wall. Literally, we ran into a wall because after a few hours of looking, contemplating and attempting to do a nipple count (it got a little fuzzy after 500), we grew tired and forgot to look where we were going.

But among this mix of anything and everything, a few pieces stood out (in a good way) on the floors we conquired (8, 9, 10 and 11). Here they are:

Pierre Davis — Plywood sculptures


Linda Lowery — Crying baby paintings


Cory Oberndorfer—Summer treat paintings


Matt Sesow—Crazy awesome wall of work


Emily Piccarilo—Paintings on stretched canvas tied to wrought iron


DC Creepers—Sketches and paintings of random people in public (also appeared in Artomatic 2009)


Eric Celarier—"Wasteland Series"—that's a quilt made out of old computer guts!


The WaPo Peeps Diarama Contest—Our personal favorite: The Black Peep


Marcia Jestaedt—Raku ceramic jackets


David D'Orio—"Monophonic delivery"—Bike art bonanza


Melissa Badenhop—Sweet paintings on plywood


James Halloran—Serene nature painting that took us to our happy place


Phaeton Arts—Lightbox art


And this is just 13 out of over a 1,000 artists displaying their work, so thankfully the show runs through June 23. There's still time! (And you'll need it. As noted, this is a multi-day affair.) Locations and hours: 1851 S. Bell St., just a couple blocks from the Crystal City metro; Wednesdays and Thursdays: noon to 10 p.m., Fridays and Saturdays: noon to 1 a.m. and Sundays: noon to 5 p.m. Closed Mondays and Tuesdays.